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2009-05-25, 8:20 p.m.
I saw my psychiatrist today.
We talked a lot about my eating disorder.
I said that I always purge when I visit Mona (my mother in-law).
She invites N, his brothers and me to dinner every Friday.
My psychiatrist thinks that I binge and purge when I am there because I feel like I don’t deserve the delicious food she prepares.
At first I didn’t understand what she meant but I’ve been thinking about it all day and maybe it’s true.
I purge because I feel worthless and ugly.
Another thing happened today.
I had some bloodwork done a couple of weeks ago and my MD finally called me today about the results.
Apparently, I am on the verge of getting diabetes.
It must be because I binge-eat cake, cookies and chocolate.
I’ve done it for years. Diabetes also runs in my family, so this is no surprise.
I have to be careful from now on.
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